Etiquette & Expectations
Enchanté.
If you are looking for a quick chemical analysis, this is a choice option to briefly exchange pleasantries. 60 minute maximum.
1300
TWO Hours.
A little in-between sojourn for the time-challenged gentleman. Maybe an espresso and a stroll, or some other quick cardio.
2400
Three Hours.
Ideal for conversation over a cocktail, or perhaps a light lunch, happy hour, you name it; you and I could both use an anytime/anywhere pickmeup.
3000
Four Hours.
Dinner and a show? Perhaps a performance you’ve been wanting to catch, a special moment that we can share together. With a little extra time, we can really learn much about each other.
3500
Six Hours.
A superior option for short-distance travel (such as that requiring access by train, private ride, or other such service [Not Applicable for Long-Distance Travel]; feel free to contact me with any questions). Otherwise a wonderful way to spend a lazy afternoon by the lake, in the waves, or hang gliding through the mountains — whatever you’d prefer.
4200
Twelve Hours | Overnights.
All-Day or All-Night or Whatever-Gets-You-There. This indulgence by any means pairs exceptionally well with multicourse meals, operatic accompaniment, deep-tissue couples treatments, and rejuvenating in the glow of each other’s presences.
6000
Fly-Me Travel minimum.
Traveling to you, or with you, is one of my favorite things to do!
All long-distance travel dates include room (I will be staying over at minimum one night), dinner, as well as all airfare and travel fees.
I ride in business or first class where applicable, and keep my luggage light to avoid travel hassles. Travel fees will be included in addition to deposit.
All travel appointments require a 30% deposit.
6000
Twenty-Four Hours.
For those looking to truly getaway from the monotonous mundane. Life is meant to be experienced, so let’s take the reigns together and enjoy an entire day indulging our senses. This is the gateway to a full-blown weekend escape, so tread cautiously here…
9000
forty-Eight HOURS, UP TO
A Long Weekend.
You won’t be left disappointed. In fact, you may not want to leave.
Contact for a free consultation.
12000+
à La Carte.
+1000
CANCELLATIONS
Cancellations 48 hours prior, or sooner, reserve the right to rollover their deposit into a new booking.
Cancellations within 48 hours forfeit rights to their deposit, and an increased deposit will be administered upon rebooking.
Deposits
All deposits should be sent to $thesarahswann via CashApp.
All non-traveling deposits are 15% of the total rate.
All traveling deposits are 30% of the total rate, not including travel fare. Travel fare should be processed in the same order as deposit.
SCREENING & Referencing
All new clients will undergo a standard screening procedure. This includes, at minimum, a photo of your state-issued ID, your mobile telephone number, and a deposit, but I may also ask for references from other providers when appropriate.
I guarantee the safety of your information, and appreciate your cooperation for the sake of both of our safety.
I am also more than happy to provide references on your behalf, if I can, indeed, offer you a positive review.
If you have landed on my page looking to reference-check, please email me at meetsarahswann@protonmail.com.
Hygiene
If at any point I feel that you are a biohazard to me, I will terminate our engagement without a refund.
I encourage you to avoid this with some of the following tips: Arrive clean-shaven (or be otherwise meticulous with your facial hair), with fresh breath, and be evidently well-groomed. Wear clothes that are clean and suitable for our planned activities. Keep tabs on your personal health and feel free to reschedule with me if you are sick or otherwise incapable of attendance in good will.
Couples | DUOS
My services do not discriminate in any way, least of all by sex. I am always open to providing an intimate sounding board for you and any partner of your choosing.
For personal couples, I ask for an additional +300 per hour of our meeting. Both partners must undergo my screening process.
I am also always happy to get to know other providers at work, so if you’d like an arrangement such as this, let me know, and I’m happy to assist in whatever way I can.
Gifts
Gifts are never expected, but always appreciated. A couple notes to aid you in your selection of a gift to me:
I prefer fine essential oils or absolutes to conventional perfumes…
I prefer orchids to roses…
I prefer old world wines to new world wines…
I prefer nonfiction to fiction…
I wear yellow gold exclusively…
Travel and experiences are superior gifts, in my opinion…
My dress size is a 4, and my shoe is a 9.5…
to whom it may concern…
The discerning suitor understands the importance of a long-term investment, and knows that the rules of affection are not so different from any other business. The services that I offer are soulful, discreet, and empowering, and I prefer to attune my energy to those in the business of the elongated affair. I give nothing less to you than the fullness of my heart.
That being said, please also note that these rates are compensation for my time and time alone.